Bah Humbug!


by McKenzie James

 

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

It’s a Bah Humbug Scrooge kind of year.

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

Silent Night, Ho Ho Ho, Screw the Cheer!

 

Uncle Ned hit his head and it brought on his Tourette’s

and he sadly told Aunt Betty the truth about her Christmas dress.

Now there’s no going back for poor Uncle Ned.

He’s in the dog house and she won’t get out of bed.

 

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

It’s a Bah Humbug Scrooge kind of year.

 

Just last week Mom caught Dad eating lunch with his ex.

Apparently more than lunch had been shared.

Now all Dad’s belongings are out in the street

and I don’t think they were put out to be aired.

 

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

Silent Night, Ho Ho Ho, Screw the Cheer!

 

Zachary wants a high speed racer.

Zoe wants a baby doll that cries.

The house is on the market on a short sale.

Daddy drinks his beer with whiskey chaser and sighs.

 

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

It’s a Bah Humbug Scrooge kind of year

 

Aunt Mary’s been single forever.

No one wants to be her boo boo bear.

She usually buys the best presents of anyone.

But she’s broke, broken-hearted, and glum.

 

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

Silent Night, Ho Ho Ho, Screw the Cheer!

 

Jake had too much fun at the office party and got hammered.

He had fun with a woman he can’t remember.

But now his boss lady is clearly enamored.

He’ll be living down that night of fun forever.

 

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

It’s a Bah Humbug Scrooge kind of year

 

Everyone’s feeing glum, no one’s having any fun.

No one’s jolly, no one’s gay.

No one’s decking the halls, no one’s hanging any balls,

We’re just hoping the holidays will go away.

 

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

It’s a Bah Humbug Scrooge kind of year.

It’s a Bah Humbug year here in Weird Town.

Silent Night, Ho Ho Ho, Screw the Cheer!

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